Ruh Eşin Nerede?
Good Fit
- Readers who feel the same scenario repeating in their relationships and like asking themselves questions
- Those with a personal interest in astrology, chakras and dream journals
- Readers who enjoy the author's plain, chatty social-media voice
Not a Fit
- Anyone seeking an evidence-based psychology book: the main claims here are not scientifically verified
- Those with a serious psychological problem, depression or a health complaint: the book does not replace a professional
- Readers who cannot stand repetition and long «set an intention, code it» advice
This is Can Aydoğmuş's fifth book. He writes that he lost his mother, father and sister at a young age and then took personal-development courses for years. In the introduction he says he repeats ideas on purpose, to plant them in the reader's subconscious, and states plainly that he is not a psychologist, doctor, lawyer or healer; he advises anyone with a serious problem to see a specialist.
The core idea is the balance of «taking in and then letting go» in relationships. For the author a soulmate is a person whose planets sit opposite yours in the astrological charts; love at first sight (sexual, hormonal) is not a soulmate, everyone has several soulmates, and if a relationship is hard that person is not a soulmate. Painful stories such as Leyla and Majnun or Farhad and Shirin do not count as soulmates.
A running theme: out of love and a sense of belonging, people copy their parents' relationship pattern. The author gives examples: a woman who cannot digest her father's infidelity cheats on every partner; a friend who is constantly quarrelling grew up in a tense home and repeats the same pattern. The solution is «awareness», with suggestions such as watching words and thoughts, positive affirmations, saying «cancel, cancel», and a gratitude notebook.
The practical sections cover a home detox and Feng Shui layout according to the Bagua map, a «friend detox», bowing to parents saying «I accept you as you are» rather than «I forgive you», setting aside a corner at home for ancestors, and keeping a dream journal. The chapters are short, full of personal stories and rely on «miracle» examples from people the author has advised.
- Chapters are short, written in a social-media post style with many personal examples
- The same ideas («coding», «awareness», «flow») are repeated again and again throughout
- The practical instructions (gratitude notebook, dream journal, letter writing, cord-cutting meditation) are concrete and doable
- No scientific source is cited; phrases like «research has shown» are not verified
- Astrological and numerological interpretation runs through much of the text
On couples and childhood patterns, but a guide based on clinical experience
A plain presentation of the power of thought and the «law of attraction»
A shorter, more practical book on how couples express love
At the end of the part read, in the section «Listen to the voice of your heart», the author writes that the mind is «empty», that it is the heart that tells the truth, and suggests that the reader put their right hand on their heart and set an intention. Then comes the section «Do not lie»: with every lie you throw a rope around yourself, and in the end you try to move forward holding all the ropes but cannot; instead of trying to hide these ropes you can experience miracles in your life. The part ends with «Stay in joy»: in happiness and joy you are connected with the source. What follows is outside the scope of this review.
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